jayded84

This has by far been one of my biggest obstacles to overcome.. one that I’m still working on. It’s hard to change a life long habit overnight but at least once you’re consciously aware of it you can take the steps to make the much needed changes.

 My problem has always been that I use food almost as a balm or a band-aid for whatever I’m feeling.. if I’m depressed then I need chocolate and if I’m bored then at least something to munch on.. It’s almost like I’m running away from the day to day problems by turning to food.. and it’s unnacceptable. I know most of us go through it, and most of my friends even admit it.. “I just broke up with my boyfriend, let’s go get ice cream…” I have to be honest.. at the moment you are eating that ice cream all of your problems dissolve with each bite.. but (at least for me) the second the last bite is taken.. the guilt kicks in. I start realizing that I not only did not help the problem but added to it with all the calories I just injested..

So.. that’s one of my personal goals that I am working on right now.. to substitute other things for food to meet my emotional needs. From now on when I’m stressed or angry I’m going to focus that energy at the gym and when I watch a movie and need something to munch on I’ll pop a bag of fat free popcorn… little things that hopefully will make a big difference!

Pretty much ever since I can remember I have been on one diet or another… and by this I mean the many ‘fad’ diets that have come in and out of style. Even as a little girl I remember my grandmother would buy me Sea Kelp pills which are supposed to help with calorie intake or the pink patch which was supposed to help burn fat. As my weight would go up and down so would my emotions.. it was such a rollercoaster, I went through anxiety and depression for most of my teenage years and the emotional instability only helped me pack on the pounds.

I have finally reached a point in my life where I am happy with the person I am.. I know I need to make changes to be the ‘ideal’ me.. but I don’t hate myself anymore because I need to lose weight.. and I’m not doing it for anyone else.. that never seemed to work. I am doing this for ME now.. for my health and for my future.

 I know it’s not going to be easy and I’m up for the challenge… and this time I’m going to try and do things the right way.. diet and excercise and just finding a healthier lifestyle…